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Recently one of my elfs disappointed me for the last time, without any remorse Blitzen took out his Candycane and shanked the elf in the abdomen, leaving that elf impaled to freeze solid in the frigit weather of the North Pole and be eaten by feral reindeers. –

Evil santa claus

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In the last universe I went into, Santa was unprepared for my arrival, had no knowledge of me.
I visited him at his workshop in the North Pole, it was easy enough to disable his reindeer guards with horse tranqs, and to slay Santa where he sits in his office. It was a red Christmas when Ms Claus found Santa sliced in half

The Santa Claus Slayer

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12 years

critisize my work but I have no clue where to put this.

156 Views
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12 years

Hello fellow readers!I JUST WANT TO SCREAM TO THE WORLD THAT YOU ARE A FAKE, LYING, ATTENTION SEEKING, BIOTCH!!!

235 Views
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12 years

I dated a girl who cheated on me regularly with two black guys, and even though it was borderline obvious at times I acted dumb because it turned me on like crazy. I knew I was bi, and I’d wear her lingerie when she wasn’t around, and eat her all...

163 Views
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12 years

So, I gave my first b****** last night… I am 18, a virgin, and a guy. I was home alone and h****. So I got into contact with a guy from craigslist. We exchanged information and I went to meet up with him. I brought him back to my house...

184 Views
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12 years

How do you get your dog to lick your p****? I tried with mine but she just stared and sat there. I’ve never done this before and my dogs not a big fan of peanut butter.

235 Views
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12 years

I’m a female s** addict. I have fucked many men since I was a teenager. Before that, two of my male cousins would touch me and let me play with their c****. I’ve loved s** from an early age and would rub my p**** on everything (side of bathtub...

202 Views
a truth, Other
12 years

i used to be obsessed with the Power Rangers but i was embarrassed about it

197 Views
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12 years

all I want to do is f*** guys and eat muffins.

169 Views
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12 years

First of all your a f****** f*****, second of all your girlfriends a stupid FAT f***** and thirdly you both have a f***** relationship. I hate the word but it seems most appropriate to describe how f****** stupid you two are. But it’s not all the girls fault, you are...

162 Views
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12 years

How many cheap Jews does it take to build a bank?

232 Views
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12 years

OVER -house arrest for battery against a kid felon who has been on probation and in and out of juvie since he was thirteen with asinine actions and as judgmental and controlling now a terrible husband giving crappy food on our last vacation in trouble with police again, last minute...

170 Views
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12 years

So the first time I had s** I accidentally stuck it in the girls a**. she didn’t stop me and I didn’t even realize it was her a** until I pulled out and she s*** everywhere

181 Views
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12 years

Anyone who is familiar with the Greenville, NC area most likely has heard about a company called Physicians East. Physicians East also has entities that are apart of it and one of their entities is called Urgent Care. Urgent Care is located on 1711 E. Arlington in Greenville, NC. If...

156 Views
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12 years

Looking forward to nuclear war. Everyone gets blasted at once! Humans are disgusting creatures. People are selflessly ugly.People are scum!

178 Views
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12 years

I hope your dog f****** dies and rots in hell. I hope it gets f****** ran over by a f****** car and the blood gets smeared all over your ugly, ignorant, dumb, stupid f****** hillbilly racist facem F*** you and f*** your worthless dog.

192 Views
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12 years

God, how did I end up with the craziest in-laws? Literally in terms of mentally and religiosity–they’re crazy and they’re driving me ape s*** crazy too. It’s a good thing we’ve got our own place kind of away from both of them to give us some space or I’d be...

164 Views
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12 years

F****** lazy a** people! Easier to always get spoon fed the answers than do the f****** work to find it yourself. Always gotta be lookin’ for the easy way out causing more work for others. Hello, do I look like I ain’t got s*** to do? Even if so, doesn’t...

176 Views
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12 years

roman craves c****

206 Views
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12 years

So damn tired of hearing you vent about wanting a “title” and “initials” after your name and not being replaceable when you didn’t do the work to get a degree. Ain’t nobody else’s fault but your own. You want the glory and the title and money? Then go WORK for...

142 Views
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12 years

You’re a dumb, lazy, worthless dickhole of a boss, and they should pay you to stay home… they arleady pay you to do absolutely nothing. Do the factory a favor and go kill yourself.

150 Views
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12 years

dear husband,

please, stop farting. you farted 20 times today and you really made sure i smelled your insides.

ps… no i haven’t been feeding him beans. we eat the same food. he’s just making fun of me.

171 Views
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12 years

OH MY GOODNESS I’M SICK AND TIRED OF HAVING TO REMIND PEOPLE TO DO THINGS NOW, So my OLDER sister is supposedly going to go to Uni next year yet she can’t even be BOTHERED TO DO SIMPLE THINGS LIKE WAKE UP, GET WASHED, DRESSED ON TIME BEFORE WE KNOW...

187 Views
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12 years

America needs to f’nig die. This country has become so backwards and full of itself. I want to see the ending of “Fight Club” happen nationwide. Ground zero this piece of sh!t country! Nuke those bastards in Washington who are nothing more than a disease killing this nation from the...

193 Views
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12 years

You f****** idiot high school seniors who think graduation means anything… get over your f****** selves! High school is the biggest waste of your life you’ll ever have. In ten years, the “real world” problems you’ll have will make high school feel like a kiddie park. You idiot teenagers think...

182 Views
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12 years

Probably really sick of life. Nothing has been going right for me recently. The girl I am mad over has said we are nothing but friends although I am pretty sure she likes me. Not sure what the hell is wrong with her. So my ego came in play and...

207 Views
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12 years

I’m so sick of catering to my housemates. I want out of this damn house so badly I can’t stand it. I finally got hired for a job that I’ve desperately needed, but been having depression and anxiety problems for so long that it’s taken me a while to get...

116 Views
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12 years

My girlfriend was a s*** in college and it’s been bothering me to no end because I know some of the guys she’s slept with and it’s f****** disgusting. I’m in love with her and it’s all f****** tainted because I can’t get over this s***.

918 Views
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12 years

Zionist Jews enjoy terrorizing and killing children! Muslims enjoy killing terrorizing and killing children! Roman Catholics enjoy terrorizing and killing children! Protestant Christians enjoy terrorizing and killing children! Eastern Orthodox Catholics enjoy terrorizing and killing children! Zionist Jews are bullies! Roman Catholics are assholes! Protestant Christians are douchebags! Eastern Orthodox...

205 Views
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12 years

So I just recently started working for McDonalds. I’ve been there 4 weeks and just a day ago I had a problem with a “support manager.” When she wasn’t around the other managers made it seem like they understood me and had my back since all witnesses knew I was...

212 Views
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12 years

I freakin love how people say they are your friend and treat you great when you have something to offer them. When you share everything, including your birthday presents, when you do things for the no one else would…but as soon as you have nothing they become greedy and selfish...

166 Views
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12 years

Mark Levin is a cheap Jew. You can catch the cheap Jew’s radio show around 9PM across America. The cheap Jew is the author of a book called “Liberty and Tyranny.” It’s all about being a cheap Jew in America.

277 Views
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12 years

have an acquaintance who is just starting out as an actor. I’m actually happy for him and I hope he makes it big. However, his acting career is all he ever writes about on Facebook! It’s annoying as heck! I get it, dude. You’re excited about your acting career. There’s...

191 Views
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12 years

his person is so fake. I’ve been friends with this person for 3 years and as of recently i’ve found out all the negative things this person had done to me behind my back. I’ve been good friends to this person but I’ve realize that all my efforts being a...

137 Views
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12 years

Thanks sis. Whenever she get’s upset over anything, it’s always, “Oh, are you alright, are you hurt?” Whenever I’m upset over something, my family wonders why. YOU FORGOT MY BOYFRIEND CHEATED ON ME WITH MY BEST FRIEND, WHY DO YOU THINK I’M ANGRY. “But, ohhh, my sister can’t find a...

200 Views
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12 years

I DONT WANT TO SEE ANY OF MY EXES WITH SOMEONE NEW. IT HURTS WAY TOO MUCH

191 Views
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12 years

I have a friend living next door to me on res at Uni and up until a month ago I haven’t wanted to lynch him. Sure he’s a year younger and comes from a different background but the way he acts especially since he’s gotten a girlfriend (something he swore...

165 Views
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12 years

I have a friend living next door to me on res at Uni and up until a month ago I haven’t wanted to lynch him. Sure he’s a year younger and comes from a different background but the way he acts especially since he’s gotten a girlfriend (something he swore...

182 Views
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12 years

Get it through your head, you douche. Back THE F*** OFF. YOU AND I WILL NEVER BE ANYTHING!!! F*** off with the stupid texts already. I’M NOT ATTRACTED TO YOU AND NOTHING YOU SAY OR DO IS GOING TO CHANGE THAT!!! We are nothing, we will never be anything so...

119 Views
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12 years

I WANT EVERYONE AROUND ME ON THERE A**, SEEING JOYCE POORTER SAID TO ME SOMEONE WANTS ME ON MY A**.

I WANT EVERYONE AROUND ME ON THEIR BARE HAIRY A** INFRONT OF THE WORLD! BEING FUCKED LICKING UP THE SLUDGE AND SLIME FROM THE GUTTER LIKE I DID AS A...

213 Views
a guilt, Other
12 years

A couple of years ago me and my girlfriend + a mutual friend had a fun night of dancing and drinking. We all came back to my apartment and they ended up kissing (something gf and I had talked about her doing with a female friend, but also made it...

149 Views
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