I’ve got a d*** rash

That’s the way we like it on the r*** express.
-the polar express.

Bro thinks he’s drake

I want to have s** with my son

I am Mature and Married for 30++ years. I am also a closet Cross-Dresser. Mostly Lingerie and costumes… when I am dressed up, I feel like a w****, S***, Tramp and I want to be used like a Girl.

I met another older guy on Craigslist, and went to...

I hate every last one of you indians, get the f*** out of Canada you Rats

I’m gay for Santa

I can’t help it but touch that a** sometimes.
-mall Santa fml.

Elephant snack

So what? You’ve got a d*** …. that don’t Impress me much.
-Shania twain.

I started giving blow jobs to boys when I was just 13. I did it because this boy I liked was interested in this other girl and I wanted him to like me. I just went over to his house knowing his parents worked and he was alone. He didn’t...

It’s simple math, germans are superior

So what? You’ve got a pocket knife…. that don’t Impress me much.
-Shania twain.

So what? You’ve got a basement suite …. that don’t Impress me much.
-Shania twain.

I got my d*** sucked in a fucken value village dress section, pulled up a slightly used couch and left a c** stain on it. Got my d*** sucked by a fucken transvestite

After my accident I was in need of a good doctor, they saved my life.
-David, 75, currently deceased.

I put a bunch of fish in a bowl, and put my d*** in with fish food so they’d bite my d***.
-Steve from pet smart.

S** with your dad

To Husband/confess:

The rule is:

“IF there is any chance of your husband finding out through other means, then YOU tell him first to avoid his having to learn through other avenues. IF there is no REALISTIC chance of him finding out about your cheating through other means, then you...

My husband has no idea how many men I had s** with before I met him. He knows I wasn’t a virgin or anything but he thinks the only men I was with was in a couple of relationships.
I moved here a few years ago after what happened...

I should had told you I love you instead of running from my feelings now it’s too late I guess.

I want to f*** Lilly in her Volkswagen

I got my d*** sucked in hamburg hbf by a fucken transvestite in the 1 euro toiletten

I went to bed with my married son after my sister’s retirement dinner.

Nate Dogg? More like dead Dogg.

Rob Ford was a f****** legend

Du bist eine n****!

In the 5 years I lived with my friend, I secretly used his sextoys more than he did.

I used every single one of his toys more than he did. At my worst, I was using them weekly

Use my d*** as a pencil and draw your father

Poland woman are 10s

I’ve tried so hard to save my marriage, but my wife is just playing around so I’ll take care of her. I meet amazing women every time I leave the house and feel like a scumbag for wanting a different relationship, and then come home and feel like an idiot...

My friends wanted to take me to a BBQ, turns out it was a KKK rally, f*** my work friends. Next time I’ll go to the salvation Army Bible night

Düsseldorf Germany has some s*** b******

Honestly Fredericktown is a s*** hick town

Canada? Don’t you mean f****** India China

My niggas Gucci belt got a Lotta Gs on it.
-santasquad100

Who goes to jail if a different personality commits a crime but isn’t present during sentencing.
-real life skitso.

If you like y0ung g1rls s3x check it
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If you like y0ung g1rls s3x check it
join vipland (d0t) in
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Remove the space and replace the d0t to .

You fucked my father once? I fucked your uncle for 12 consecutive months.
-SantaSquad100