I’ve had trust issues for a long time. I tend to sabotage myself when something is going good cause I’m preparing for something to go bad. I try to find out if that person is genuine or not. I begin to second guess everything they say to me, even their actions. I have gone as far as making up email accounts, using texting apps and social media accounts. I try to find out whatever info. I can. I don’t know why I do this and I want to stop. I just don’t know how. It creates alot of drama and it eventually causes a fight and I make myself look like the victim. I don’t know what to do anymore. I really need to get this off of my chest. I just want to stop doing this and trust again, but I don’t know how. I feel terrible for the things I’ve done and wish I never did them. I don’t knwo what else to do. I have prayed and asked God for forgiveness. I’ll go into hiding and I won’t contact anyone for months. I delete social media accounts to stay away from them. I don’t want to hurt people’s feelings anymore.