I have only had one boyfriend, so sometimes it's hard for me to.realize that I miss the relationship and not him because the idea of the two are so

12 years

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I have only had one boyfriend, so sometimes it’s hard for me to.realize that I miss the relationship and not him because the idea of the two are so connected.

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I fell in love with my best friend. I may have fallen so far in love that every day brings me pain. Not when he’s there, then I’m happy. Truly happy. Like everything matters and I can feel like myself. But I’m so lonely being apart from him. It’s like a part of me is missing. So we’re moving in together. As friends. And it kills me. But I need it. And now he’s dating a girl. And it kills me. I think it’s making have hateful, mysogynistic thoughts towards women in general and I don’t like that part of myself. I’ll never get to be with him and it f****** kills me.