I been seeing a e*****/prostitute since April 2013. A Brazilian girl, 27yrs old, curvy waist, natural all over, smooth skin and overall my ideal girl. I paid for her e***** time April about 3 times, May twice, June once, July twice, August once, Sept Five times, Oct three times and Nov once. She gives me a excellent experience of love, intimacy, s**, romance and it is amazing. It feels real. I got her mobile number, she rarely replies to my texts and I text her very often with millions of questions and my thoughts about her. I love her experience it is the best, the kissing, hugs, freedom to do as I please to her, its great, she feels fantastic, gives me more than I can ever experience from a girl and I really like her. The experience feels like a real girlfriend with plenty of love. I spent lots of money on her this year… She is leaving on 14th December until April 2014 to Brazil. Who knows she will actually return. My problem is I spent lots of money on her that I could of saved and used more wisely. I feel obessed about her even though we can never be more than client and services. I have love for her, I care about her, I can not stop thinking of her and it hurts. I am happy and sad. my feelings are mixed. the experiences are short lived and leaves me empty, lonely and sort of depressed. I went to see her last time today and paid her £260 which is lot of money to give away in one day. I actually realized today it was a service and her love was not real. However I am still thinking of her, losing my mind, unable to focus and need help and support please, someone to discuss this with and finally be able to give this up. someone please help. thank you.