Whenever I m*********, I crap my pants on purpose because I think it’s stimulating and it helps get me off easier.
I know exactly how it sounds, but it’s the truth. And it’s become such a regular experience now that I barely even think about it anymore. But when I DO think about it, it makes me hate myself. I’m completely aware how thoroughly disgusting of a habit it is. I’m a single guy and I’m completely aware that no woman would ever come anywhere near me would they ever find out about this habit of mine. My family would despise me, all my friends would despise me. In fact, I don’t WANT them to accept it and somehow make me feel better about it, even if they for some reason would; that would just be absolutely weird. I want to fight it, I want to get rid of it, I want to feel like a normal, clean person with a normal, clean conscience.
