Some of this i learned and processed years after when my mother told me. Even when i was an infant if i was crying or fussy she would fondle my g e n i t a l s to soothe me and take me to breast. Apparently even when she was trying to toilet train as a first reward system she would do it as a reward. When i was no longer bedwetting she had me sleep in her bed. She continued to brrastfeed me for many years, long past puberty. She did so to make me obedient whether it was good grades or chores or general behavior. When school first started it was neurotic so she escalated it. At some point that i remember from around 7 or 8 she would use her mouth as a special treat. She also said she did it because boys are dirty and bad. She said she did it to keep me from shaming or degrading myself. When hair began to grow on my body she kept me shaved because she said ikept me her cute little boy. She did not tell me this until i dreamt it but apparently overnight she would commonly at same general age have me lay on top of her and rub my p e n i s against her between her legs. These things happened commonly until the first time i e j a c ulated when she had her mouth on me. From that event on she would have me enter her and climax every morning and every night at bedtime. To her it was keeping me good and focused and making good grades all the way through college (local, lived with her). It continued until her age made it too difficult to do safely and she eventually had of her in home caretakers serve as her surrogate for higher pay. I still see that caretaker since my mother died and i continue to oay her to visit her several times a week. I have never dated or been with any other women. Mother got me addicted to infantile headspace s** for control and i have no ability to be attracted to or date or have relationship,s** because i am helplessly trapped in that whole messed up mommy mentality.
Grimlock, SHHH, Shitttt!
Rodimus Prime
Julie Martz the more lies you tell, the more you will burn in HELL. You’re going to end up putting yourself there so keep it up, you are the scum of the earth liar. Vince never did anything to you, and you know that he Never wanted you at all. So, get of it. The more lies you tell, the more your making yourself look STUPID. Maybe you need to get rid of yourself. Just go away. She works at Giant in McConnellsburg pa She is nothing but a troublemaker of the whole town.
Test
We locked eyes tonight multiple times tonight. Goddamn you were cute. I felt we had something. I wish I had made a move.
I love my mom to death, but a part of me wishes she wouldn’t be here, because then I could take my own life in peace
TW: Self harm
I’m 33 years old but I’ve been so lost, depressed, and numb from life beating me down that I self harmed the other day. Nothing dangerous – I took a Razer blade (which i sanitized first) and sliced very tiny marks into my arm just to watch...
I convinced myself I was delusional and it was unrequited love </3. 🥀 No one’s to hurt if no one’s to care.
i feel so off. the browncel person messed with my brain a bit. i just feel hopeless and dissapointed. not really sad or depressed. just uncomfortable. i think its seeing someone from my own race, someone whos also southasian being an incel just unsettles me. i know i shouldnt be...
I loved with all I had. You were my god, my everything. Then you died. Now I am nothing. I hate you! I have no life without out you.
I have two boyfriends 🙁 and they both stress me out. One more so than the other -_-
i feel so f****** done. is there a way to make things better? wheres the line between listening and giving a platform to a dickhead. how can we improve things. it all feels so difficult.
Eminem Done. No Refund.
I’m falling for him again. I can’t do this. Out all the people in the world, I decide to fall for my best friend? Holy f*** bro what is wrong with me tbh😭 I met him in gr. 6 and we got closer this year in february. I started liking...
Every f****** time I want to use my own f****** bathroom the willfully unemployed parasite is in there. I can’t even take a piss in peace in my own f****** house I f****** pay for. AAAGGGGHHHHH
People are always saying they hate themselves. Sometimes I wonder if they know what real self-hatred is like, where you hate yourself like your worst enemy. Absolutely s*** situation. And if any of you knew me you’d agree that I deserve every ounce of misery in my sick life. I...
My Mom’s Sausage dog urinated on my knees today while I was anally penetrating him. It’s not easy being Trans ☹
I feel cold and lonely. Every corner I turn, there’s an unfair fight waiting for me. I feel like giving up. I don’t want to fight anymore. I don’t want to wake up tomorrow. I feel like a coward, and unworthy.
Several years ago my dog was s******* assaulted by 3 Drag queens on their way home from the local gay bar. My security camera showed He was sodomized by two of them and fingered by the third. During his veterinarian examination they found a broken fluro blue fingernail inside his...
I cant stop these regrets. I need help coping. So many this year alone. This is horrible to live with.
This whole situation with H is making me anxious. I know I never went so low, I know I shouldn’t put myself in his shoes bc he was disgusting But I can’t help but feel bad abt the death threats Could he have been as hurt as me?...
I don’t get why the LGBTQ+ community gets so much hate. How could you be so triggered from seeing two people of the same gender kiss? How could you be so disgusted seeing a person be who they truly are? Do people just hate things that aren’t considered “normal”? People...
I learnt that the reason I became a people pleaser is because it’s my way of trying to survive. I was trying to please and make my father happy by being the best daughter I could be. No matter how many times he shouted at me or how many times...
I still remember. I still remember the touch of their dirty hands on my body. No matter how many times I shower I feel tainted and disgusting. No matter how much clothes I put on, no matter how much skin I cover, they stare and ogle at me. Please stop....
I hate it when they say to “peay to God”,”Talking to God will help fix your depression” or “It’s God’s test. Is it God’s plan to make me suffer? Is it God’s plan for me to be s******* harrassed? Is it God’s plan for me to slit my wrists? If...
if you see this i like you but i will probably just end up hurting you
My mother hated the fact that I was a minister. I showed that b****. I preached her funeral. All you have to do is outlive your enemies and Jesus will give you the victory. Even if it is your b**** mama.
None of the adults in my life have taken me seriously when I told them about being SA’d regulargy by a “friend” from ages 11-16 since I wasn’t actually r*ped, and it makes me feel like a complete failure and like my experience isn’t valid and I’m not allowed to...
man sometimes its hard
i constantly hope that something really bad will happen to me so i have an excuse to kill myself
I can’t remember the last time I was truly happy. For as long as I can remember whenever I have made a wish (shooting star, birthday candles, first star of the night etc) I’ve wished to be happy. I’m now in my thirties and feel so alone with no way...
I know nasasaktan ka ngayun, sus bayaan mo nayun grabe kasi mag bigay ng mixed signals ehhh kainis, basta andito ako para damayan yang sakit na nararamdaman mo sabi ko naman sayo eh tayo nalang kasi WHAHAHAAH CHARING
I am waisting my childhood over the fact that im ugly and i hate it. Im only 14 but i havent gone to in person school since maybe 2020 when covid came. I lock myself up in my room and i dont come out untill i feel “perfect”. I hate...
I’m afraid of my father. Whenever he shouts my heart beats so fast. My lips quiver, and i tremble with fear. He decided to adopt 2 puppies. But since they are puppies, they are extremely loud and whine all the time. He treats the puppies like he used to treat...
I knew my sister should have had an abortion. She was in a bad relationship with her husband and, the child was born. Now 8 he is mentally ill and abusive and both, my sister who is also mentally ill and now f****** massive burdens on the family. I wish...
Bro im beyond mad, I take baking as a hobby and have been for like 2 years. went to the store like 3 days ago and bought Pillsbury flour for the first time because the flour i like wasn’t in stock fsr. For the last 3 days I thought i...
It’s been 10 years and I still love you. I regret so much that I lied to you. I dream about you still and I expect I’ll talk to you again one day, at least I hope so. You have a wife and children, and I have a partner, but...
I’m a soft beta male sissy boy. I have pasty white skin and am shaped like a bowling ball with supple man t***. I have a thick hipster beard and thin-framed glasses. I use big words to sound smart and like to “center” and “amplify” and “be an ally to”...
I HATE YOU. I HATE YOU SO MUCH. I HOPE YOU F****** DIE. I PRAY EVERYDAY THAT YOU’RE DEAD. I HATE HOW WHEN YOU’RE IN MY DREAMS, YOU ARE SO MUCH STRONGER THAN ME. YOU RUINED ME. YOU TREATED ME LIKE I WAS SOME OBJECT. I HATE YOU. I HATE...
greasy backbush
You said you treasure our friendship. But what did you do in the end? You destroyed our friendship.
my hoarding is going to kill me.
I hate waking up. I hate having to deal with the consequences of trying to die the night before. The overdoses upsetting my stomach. The washing of my bloody bedsheets after the blood loss makes me fall asleep. The guilt of not being able to get killing myself right. I...
My a** is aflame
