Dear Markus, I am honestly, utterly, helplessly in love with you, you fool. There, I said it. I know it is only hormones that make me feel that way and I was right to tell you I do not want to date you anymore, but even though, I wish for nothing more than to hold you and be close to you. I did not lie, i fell out of love with him ages ago and even though I was honest about it and us, I feel guilty everytime I see him…still I know he is the wiser choice. I know you and me would not work out, you are too young and foolish and you have no longterm relationship experience. But even though, you have a heart of gold and I wish I could have told you and let you feel how much i care for you. You are a wonderful person and worthy of so much more than I can give. I wish someone you fall for will love you back and make you the happiest man in the world. You deserve nothing less. I know for a fact that it will pain me horribly to see you with someone else, but there is nothing in the world I want more than to see you smile… Apart from maybe, for all those bullies from VB, that were mean to you when you were young, whoes words even today make you feel like you’re broken, to fall down from cliffs while hiking and break their legs and arms.
And because I never told you in person, here it is:
I love you. I really, really do.