he’s not a p********. stop talking about him like that. all you’ve done is grab onto a small part in a larger scheme of adventures and tried to blow up the small little piece because you hate. go make your own excitement. you’re going to get in trouble for harassing people.

**i’m sorry. i know i was mean to you, i’m a different person now. so much so that he asked if he’s ever seen my mean side and he hasn’t because it doesn’t exist. i couldn’t imagine saying or doing anything that might hurt him. i love him. i know i said the most terrible things to you and it hurts me to think about what i said. i thought you were this brilliant and amazing man, and i’m sorry, i never thought you belonged to me to show you that. i’m a person who needs to be told or it does not exist. and once you’ve made me feel like i shouldn’t do something, nothing will reverse that except telling me to do the opposite. i’m a pragmatic little s*** who will play with you how i want to until you shut it down, and when you do you need to positively reverse it by telling me. i don’t know if the both of you are doing this to get some crazy last chance bj or what the hell is going on. if you wanted me all had to do was ask. i would have happily did both of you in one visit any way you wanted. fuking nuts.