I feel as though my family hates me and even as I was opening this site I was in a massive breakdown because my family never sides with me. I get everyone’s anger and frustration and I can never get upset because they get even angrier. I tried talking with my dad and he only sighed and yelled at me to just do what I was told. I heavily considered suicide only an hour ago at best, I drank some alcohol and grabbed a hunting knife my dad left out and just sat on the couch and stared at it. I put it down knowing that I was in an emotional state while home alone and I tried reaching out to friends only to choke and stare at my phone. The worst part is they are trying to act like nothing happened. It hurts that I’m too scared to talk to people about this again. I was in therapy all my life and since I hit college it seems to have gotten bad since I stopped and it’s suffocating.
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Don’t kill yourself. Don’t hurt yourself. It isn’t worth it. There is a bunch of amazing things you can do in your future, do you really want to miss out on that? If you have any friends then reach out to them, and run away to them. That will tell your family you don’t feel loved.