I’m a male. I’ve done bad things to family and friends when I was around age 12-13. It was a confusing time in my life. I had experienced s***** abuse from my brother and two older cousins, ranging from dry h****** to full molestation. The older of the two cousins molested me for two years at least twice a week when I lived with my grandparents. Nobody noticed how often he would take me away from my video games or playing with cousins my age so he could have his way with me. Eventually it got to the point where I wanted to feel what he felt, I wanted to understand why he kept doing what he did to me. Regrettably, I did the same thing as he did to me, but to my younger cousins and younger friends for a while, maybe a year I experimented with my s******* by using my cousins. Eventually my cousins were caught trying to have s** with each other and when they were questioned by their parents, I was named as the one who gave them the idea. Police got involved and I revealed that my cousin had also been molesting me. I went to court and plead guilty to some charges against me. I was sent to a county jail before being transferred to a DYS treatment center where I got treatment for my mental illness. I was away for 2 and a half years. The police never pursued a case against my cousin, probably because he was a star player for the football and basketball teams of our town. He finished high school in our town and continues to live his life like nothing happened. I had to move schools and make new friends. It wasn’t long before people at my new school started to hear that a child molester was in there class. At that point, I decided to deny any and all accusations to keep what few friends I had. I hate myself for what I did, I battle suicidal thoughts as well as Homicidal thoughts towards my abusers everyday. I know there are people who wish to kill me. I may have an awful title to my name, but I’ll eradicate anybody who comes my way seeking my destruction. I wish people could understand that there’s a human being behind my title, but if the world wants a monster, they will get one. F*** around and find out people of Earth