Hi, J.

I don’t know how to say this. Really I don’t. It’s been eating me up inside. But I have to come clean. On the night of 12 July, I went out with a friend for dinner and drinks and suffice to say, for the lack of a better term, I cheated. We had s**. It wasn’t great to be dead honest. But the guilt has been wearing away at my conscience ever since. Because I know that you love me, and I love you with the fibres of my being.. I have to be honest with you. I’ll understand this will enrage you, hurt you and of course.. you have every single right to be. I understand if you want to break up after hearing this.

But to be honest there were quirks about our relationship that I disliked. For starters, I always felt like a key to your intrepid desires in the USC community. The way you would constantly reach out to multiple women in the beginning of our partnership ABSOLUTELY infuriated me. I’ve seen the posts on USC. I didnt like it, but I stayed, because I cared for you and I saw potential in our future. The fact that on the night of our staycation at Studio M, where I’ve already expressed no desire to have other people over, I found your post where you were explicitly looking a single, submissive female to join you? How did you think that made me feel? Have you considered, well, at the very least check with me if I was okay with it? I’ve seen the timestamp of that post. That was way before you asked in person whilst we were already in our room! But of course no one was available so you had to settle with just me, right?

S*******, to be dead honest, we’re incompatible. What I want is a monogamous relationship with someone who wants me, and only me. Clearly you want to be part of the swingers lifestyle, but I don’t want any part of it. That’s not to say I didn’t like the SRS session we did, but moving forward I don’t want it. And more so for my next partner.

And lastly, I know it’s out of your control and it breaks my heart that I have to say this.. but you’re the smallest I’ve ever been with. Maybe some else will be pleased with your size, but that someone won’t be me. As much as I love to give, I can’t always be the giver during s**. It’s unfair to me. I have needs, and I need s***** satisfaction for this whole thing to work. F***, I feel like a b**** just saying this. Well I guess I am. Its honesty hour so I have to come clean with you.

I’m so, so, so, sorry. I love you. Truly I do. I loved spending time with you. I loved just talking with you. The night when we had the long talk at Harbourfront is something I wont forget. It was great. I loved the cuddles. I loved the way you hold my hand. I loved your kisses and the physical comfort you bring when you’re with me. What I loved the most about you is that you’re goal oriented and headstrong in working and hustling for your future. Truly, I hope your future agency blooms, and I trust that you will find great success at work with your bro at your side. And mostly, I truly, deep inside my heart trust that you find a beautiful, sweet girl who will be perfect for you. That girl just won’t be me.

And for that, I’m sorry, once again. I don’t think you’ll ever forgive me, but if you don’t, let’s end it.