I am a stalker. When I fall in love with someone so deeply, I go insane, I don't even have to know them to be so in love with them, it's a guilt but I

4 years

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I am a stalker. When I fall in love with someone so deeply, I go insane, I don’t even have to know them to be so in love with them, it’s a guilt but I don’t care about anything anymore. I only want him, nothing else matters, nobody else matters to me and his name will be carved into my skin so many times it says forever and its covered me from head to toe. There’s a boy that likes him too and I have just yet to get rid of him, or replace him. Trust me, once I get to talking with him, he’s going to love me like I love him, he’s going to want me like I want him. I don’t mind if there’s an age gap or anything.. The other boy will resent me but does it look like I care?? He can go cry about it. There’s now way my boy really likes someone like him but if so, I know then he has low standards, so changing my appearance won’t be a too important factor. I may label this as a guilt but I’m gonna be honest, I don’t feel an atom of guilt, I don’t feel bad, it’s their fault for getting in my way of being happy. If you think I’m a bad person and I need help, I know I am, I know I do but I can’t truly control this, my obsession is taking over my every action, every thought, evrything. I don’t even know if my personality is mine anymore, I don’t even know who I really am, this is all I have and I can’t afford a therapist, so I’m sorry for the people that think I’m a bad person, but I’m not sorry for the people I hurt in the process. I hope someday I do feel guilt, I’m sorry for not being sorry.

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