I’m currently 15, almost 16, and I’ve been addicted to p********** since I was about 9 or so.
I understand how harmful it is for people, let alone teenagers, I can’t quit it. I’ve tried hard, but it’s so overbearing that I watch like 4 videos on a normal day. I’ve been with a girl who knows I used to be addicted who I’ve told that I stopped and how disgusting it is, which I believe it is disgusting.
I’ve been doing it still I just can’t stop. I’d do anything to end it really, not my life but the addiction and I have nobody to talk to about it, don’t even feel safe asking my parents for help and it’s not out of embarrassment.
I’ve been thinking about stopping since about 2018 when I started getting into online neo-nazi communities and they would talk about issues like p***, which they blame of the Jews, and religion, but since then I figured out that the ideologies were useless and especially the nazis I knew were all stupid. To clarify, I’m not racist not even prejudiced, I was an edge lord like a ton of other retarded kids. I’d go deeper into that whole phase but I digress.
Since then I’ve been with this girl who I love more than anything I’ve ever loved. She’s Mormon, not the kind that believe in polygamy but like a regular Christian type. She doesn’t believe in s** before marriage or course, but we’ve done some things that don’t include penetration. She found out I watched p*** through my search history on my phone and she was destroyed over it. I promised her I stopped but I can’t do anything to end it. It’s too convenient and I can’t control my urges well enough, I just say I’ll stop later which sounds like a cliche but it’s true. I’m just looking for websites to give me advice on how to stop. I don’t even think this confession will get any responses because of its length so I’ll post another one that’s smaller. I’ll check them both every day. Please if anybody could help.