i don’t know if i am the a****** or not in this situation. basically, my boyfriend (M, 16) and i (F, 16) had been together on and off for 6 months and known eachother for 8 months. he told me early on that his dad was a molester (he molested my boyfriends auntie when she was young) and he told me he had a feeling that his dad might have also touched or molested him as well. almost two months ago, i snuck off to his house (he lives in a city a three hour drive from where i live). i had enough of my parents (they are pretty abusive) and hopped on a bus without them knowing. i told them i was staying at a friends house for a couple nights. after the first night at his house i was looking through his camera roll to see if there were any pictures of us so i could send them to my own phone. i scrolled down to his hidden folder and saw soemthing i did not expect. i saw 11 photos of the same girls a**, taken at his school. i felt extremely disrespected and cheated on. she didn’t know he was taking pictures , he had taken them in secret. i immediately knew i had to leave his house. i packed my stuff and called my best friend (F, 15) who also lived in his city and was the only other person who knew i had snuck off. she picked me up with her dad and let me stay at her house for the second night. i didn’t do much, i don’t think i imposed much either, because everywhere they were supposed to go i just tagged along, and the dinner they had bought was shared with me. it was as if she and i had just been hanging out like we usually did when i visited her. she wasn’t busy either, she had the weekend free. when i got a chance to really talk in depth to my now ex boyfriend about the pictures, he told me that he didn’t know why he did it, but he went in depth into how that week he had been dealing with anxiety because trauma about his dad and his step sisters molesting him resurfaced. he told me these vivid memories had caused him so much anxiety that he felt like he “had” to take the pictrues in order to feel some control over his s********. now i know what he did was perverted, but he immediately sent himself into therapy and went to the doctor to diagnose his anxiety. he has been on medication and going to therapy for two months now. he says he understand himself better, and he promised me a better future if i got back with him. i love him dearly, and he’s truly gone out of his way to show me he loves me, he biked for nine hours to visit me and sold all of his stuff to buy a ride to visit me in my city. i got back with him after a month of thinking whether it was a good choice or not. when i told my best friend (the one who had taken me in for a night) she told me she couldn’t be friends with me anymore and blocked me. when i asked her why on another account, she told me it was because i was ungrateful about her efforts to save me when my bf and i broke up that day. she told me she went to the extremes to pick me up from his house and told me i was immature and irresponsible. i told her that i was grateful and that i didn’t want my dating choices to affect our friendship.

i thought that friends were supposed to help eachother without expecting anything in return, i feel so lost because i don’t know if i’m a bad friend or if she is.