I hacked into a friends email to see if they were cheating with my spouse
I jammed the bathroom door closed and after trying to hold on for hours, my husband pissed his pants. I gave him my lilac see-through p****** to wear but he had to wash and iron them afterwards.
F*CK MY LIFE BITTCH first day of work since Easter, now I’m the goddammm mall Santa for another fuckinn year. Been at this shitt since 2014 at Promenade mall
Mall Santa Claus FML