I am having an emotional affair with a married man. We are hours away and we have never met. It's just on the phone. I feel guilty but it's really nice to

8 years

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I am having an emotional affair with a married man. We are hours away and we have never met. It’s just on the phone. I feel guilty but it’s really nice to have someone who is able to tend to me emotionally despite the obvious fact. I fell guilty but we just can’t seem to get enough of each other. And, I think I love him (but not to the point I want him to leave his wife, I just emotionally am in love with how he treats me and is there for me). I’m a disgusting person. Sigh.

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I used to go online, find girls to have online relations with. I was a teenager. It started from the start of high school, when I was 15. At worst was F, that was my bottom barrel. It was gross. I don’t know how old she was but she was younger. It was near the end, during the pandemic. I was older, she was younger. I don’t know how much younger, but I was 16 I think. She was younger. Like 2 or 3 years younger, I dunno? It was gross of me. I regret doing it but I fear my regret isn’t because of how I hurt someone, took advantage. They were ok with it in the moment, we were both on the same hookup site. But I was gross. No question about it. There was T too but that was a 16-18 age gap. I deleted the accounts. I was just gross.