I fell pregnant at just 16, with my boyfriend who was and still is my first… being he was my first, even though I knew about “practicing safe s**” I was ignorant to those thoughts while engaging in it. Only 5 months later to us having s** I found out I was almost 3 months pregnant.. I was so scared and so was he, it was surreal. I looked to my boyfriend for closure and insurance that it would be ok and we’d figure it out but I didn’t really get that he was more towards finding a way around it… it hurt me a lot, but I also agreed at the same time… after stressing to find a solution I found out I could get a abortion via pill and even though I’d always been against it and scolded women who had abortions, there I was. As soon as I did it, I regretted it. My boyfriend does too, a lot. My heart felt broken at the fact my baby was gone and I had already felt a connection I failed to realize while I had the baby and had all these new feelings, I miss them more than ever now.. I wish so badly I wouldn’t of made that decision and I’m still trying to find a way to live with it. I can now say, almost 2 years later I can look at women with babies and feel happiness not jealous and hate or anything related to kids. Know one knew or knows. And trying to deal with it on my own nearly kills me.
