I used to drink a lot of water on days when I had book club at my house and would piss at least a couple of cups of clear pee in the coffee pot that I would then fill the rest of the way with water that I would then use to make coffee for me and anywhere from 3 to 8 of my lady friends. I would get off on it secretly somewhere in my mind a little bit.

Now, if I know I’m having people over to my house I’ll sometimes do the same thing. People love my coffee usually and I usually end up having to make another pot without peeing in it. I drink it too so I’m not doing it to gross anyone out. I don’t know. So it’s not really a guilt, though I guess it is a little bit.

I don’t know what it is about doing it. Maybe it makes me feel closer to everyone who drinks it, like I’m more a part of them than I was and like they’re closer to me or something.