This has been going on for 4 years now. And before you guys all judge me, let me say that I KNOW that this is wrong, I KNOW I’m a s***** person but it is what it is. Okay. Here goes: My best friend’s boyfriend is cheating on her with me. Let me clarify. He is not physically cheating on her (with me at least; he could have others idk). I’m more of a fwb but it’s all coming from my side. Now, when I say fwb, I mean the emotional part of it. I send him whatever he wants and he “sext” and stuff like that. It’s terrible and awful and I hate myself for everything but I can’t help it. I’ve tried to cut him out of my life before but I can’t seem to be able to. I’m emotionally attached to him. It. S****. And my best friend. Oh lord, I feel like s*** for doing this to her, and I should. I love her to pieces and she has no idea. I’m such a s***** friend. I think the reason why I can’t seem to let him go is because I’ve fallen in love with him…..or that I used to be in love with him and now I can’t let go of that ~first love~. If anyone out there has been through anything similar, please hmu so I can talk to you about it