I am a christian youth leader who watches a lot of p*** and masturbates even though I know It’s wrong and It’s damaging to me, I want to stop but I don’t have the willpower or the self control seemingly to do that. over the years I’ve been getting into sicker and sicker s*** and It has hurt all the relationships to the point where I no longer want to be close to someone in a romantic sense because I’m afraid I’ll screw it up by my ‘addiction’ to p***. I want more than anything to be free of this but I’m ashamed to ask for help from anyone because It’s such a disgusting thing to want help for and I don’t want anyone to view me in this way. I want to be different from what I am at the moment, for myself becasue I’m not happy with the way I am but also for the kids that I am a leader and supposedly a role model for. I want to be able to say that I will never m********* again
