No matter what I do, who I meet, how successful I become, it will never measure up to the way I feel about you. It’s been four years since I lost you to my own idiocy and no matter what I do, everything reminds me of you. Music I hear, movies I watch, food I eat. It doesn’t matter, it reminds me of you. You were my one true love and I would give up my entire life if I had to just so I could have a chance to hold you in my arms one last time. I called you Angel because you were the one thing that protected me, kept me safe, and made me feel like there was nothing else that mattered in the world except you and me. You were my guardian Angel. Every relationship I’ve had ever since us has felt like a joke. Nothing in my world is serious anymore and every time I think of you my world crumbles at the seams. After four years I thought I would have been able to move on. I even apologized for what I did and you forgave me but it wasn’t enough. It’ll never be enough. You’re the only person I ever think about. I don’t… I don’t know what to do anymore. You’re all I think about constantly even after four years. I still remember the first time I ever talked to you, the first time I kissed you, even the first time I told you that I love you on Google translator. It was the corniest thing ever but the way you looked at me was a look I’ll never forget. From the moment I saw you, I’ll never forget the way you looked. I’ll never forget the way you looked at me everyday, even on our worst days. The way you made me feel. The way I… the way I took you for granted. I would give my entire life just for one day with you, even an hour with you. If the cost of getting to spend one hour with you meant my life had to end I wouldn’t give it a second thought. I would give up everything to even just hear you say I love you one more time. I love you, more than you’ll ever understand Sarah and I wished I’d never hurt you. I love you so much. Forever and always.