I dream your with me 24/7... The hole in my heart may have been re-paired when i was little but it prevented me from feeling when bad things happened. You

12 years

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I dream your with me 24/7… The hole in my heart may have been re-paired when i was little but it prevented me from feeling when bad things happened. You filled that void in my soul and feelings and my love for you grows each second. The stories we write together make me dream and feel happy. Your voice makes me feel warm and fuzzy, no matter how feminine you think you sound. I love you with all my heart but I’m scared to tell you how i truly feel. If i tell you I’d talk your ear off, I’d never stop.

I’d go on and on and on. FOREVER I’D GO! I’ll write you poems and send you flowers though I’m the girl in the situation. I’ve heard you like me back but i think its a lie… Let me see your face… let me move closer so i can kiss all your fears and worries away and let me wash away the world and dream with you as everything feels unreal. This is going to go on and on and on i love you so much. I WISH YOU LIVED NEAR ME!

A truth i have, i want to kiss you for an eternity. Non-stop in a park until we have to leave. From dusk till dawn I’ll never let your lips go. It makes me sad when you talk about the other girls… I’m jealous, you speak of them so highly and never compliment me… I wish you’d speak of me that way… If you ever move closer.. be my number one… I want to be able to see you… everyday… please god thats all i beg, i beg for you to let me live my life with this boy and grow old with him.

I can’t just fantasize about you its not enough… I stare at my blank paper and think of you tapping my pencil, i stare at the drawings of you my face red, i stutter when i talk to you and dont even notice. My nose is pink, my cheeks are red, my heart has stopped, its like im dead.

YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW MUCH I WORRY ABOUT YOU! I know you have anxiety, i know a lot of things hurt… and if i was there I’d kiss it all away. Kiss you until the only thing you could think about is how the way your lips feel, you could be the worst kisser in the world and i would not stop. Just one simple kiss is what i wish. I wish on stupid websites to kiss you, and i pray and wish in the world away from the internet… FAKE STORY KISSES ARENT ENOUGH! But they are enough to make me blush.

I bite my lip when i walk to you i cant help it. Kiss me please… Draw with me, cuddle with me when its cold, tell stories with me… I haven’t told you my life sorrows because i worry you will worry for me… I hate your anxiety i get so worried for you please please dont cry. You ask why i get so uptight when people are rude or little things… Its because i want to protect you like a dog protects its owner i never want to see you hurt ever. PLEASE PLEASE I LOVE YOU!

I regret not telling you whats happened in my life but i can’t bring myself to it. Your name is amazing to me, your smart and attractive… I didnt even give you my heart yet you’ve stolen it… These girls you talk about… It hurts me… so much it hurts it hurts it hurts i cry when you talk about them… these girls… they arent right for you… no… they dont love you like i do… I won’t meet my soul mate at my age now but I feel I want to be with you forever. I like your social awkwardness and how you listen to my stories. I will not stop wishing to kiss you in the real world away from skype…

I love your nickname… and you.. you in general… I’ve loved you for over a year now but im shot down this year… Why… Why did you shoot me down… that hole in my heart burst open, the repair failed when you called this girl aphrodite… My chest hurts… it hurts, i cant breath im dizzy i feel like someone hung me… Please love me and only me… I want to see you and just kiss you non stop… I love you so much… so much… so much…

New Confession

I wish I knew others that had experienced this before. You dated someone just to find out they’re a narcissist that ends up replacing you with a dangerous criminal and within months the criminal passes away. This criminal wanted to write me a letter using a relatives mailing address and my relative said that she wasn’t getting involved in drama. I forgive but in the back of my mind,I question if God protected me from serious harm. Why do I feel as though this person faked their death and has actually left America when the website for the funeral home is trustworthy and they wouldn’t keep fake obituaries? Why do I feel my ex will find someone else to finish a dirty deed the previous and deceased partner had planned? Seriously, I wonder if anyone else had this experience before.

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