They always say you will remember your first love, but my god do I hope I forget you, crying as Pity S** plays Drown Me Out in the background stranded in Brooklyn made me realize so much. I have loved you for far too long, you once said, “The most precious thing you could ever give someone is time.” Why is it that I have given you so much of my time only to have it result in tears and fabricated memories just so I don’t ever learn to hate you. I constantly compare all of these ‘loves’ that I force myself to have just you can disappear from my memory. That’s all I want you to be, a memory. I love you Chris but I think you have broken me for far too long and I have no idea how to be fixed.