I’ve been casually making out with my best friend for a few years now, but it was never more than kissing and she had a boyfriend so it was never anything more than that. Now she’s single and her mom keeps asking if we’re dating which we are so not. The other day our making out went a little further and I was totally okay with it until she started asking what it meant and if I could see myself dating her and now I feel like s*** and I don’t want to ruin a friendship over this. She is incredibly beautiful and I do love her, but only as a friend. I can’t see myself dating her or really anyone at this point in my life, but I think that’s what she wants and I don’t want to hurt her.
I can’t stand the thought of losing her or seeing her hurt but I don’t want to be with her. I can’t be with her. I don’t know what to do. I’m trying to create space between us, but I don’t want to push her too far away because she really is my best (and only) friend. Maybe if we don’t see each other for a few days everything will be okay but maybe it’ll go right back to how it was that night and I really don’t want that because I don’t want to hurt her or lead her on. I love her and I feel so terrible about all of this but she’s my only friend and I can’t lose her. I don’t know what to do