I have been addicted to p********** for most of my life. I pressured my girlfriend to have s** with me by complaining when she said no, and she later told me she felt compelled to have s**. After she broke up with me, I started drinking and abusing prescription drugs. I started going to strip clubs and blowing money on anything that would numb the pain. I spent so much money on food, hotels, women. At my lowest, my friend took me to a brothel twice. I am so ashamed. I want forgiveness and redemption. I have gone insane trying to find it.