12 years
x
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I’ve come to realize.
I’m a complete and utter b******.
When me and my girlfriend first started going out… well… I disregarded her. I drove her to be on the edge of suicide. Twice.
I hurt her. Never physically, but still.
I killed her want to be artistic. And god is she.
I’ve wore out I’m sorry past the point where she just nods now.
It’s been two years. I’m controlling. I. She’s the only friend I have. I love her. More than anything.
I really do. I need her. I want her.
I’ve never even looked at another girl in the entire time we’ve been together.
I’m a sadist in the bedroom. And we only realized that after she admitted being a masochist. I took her first time. She took mine.
I’m afraid of hurting her.
No one knows we’re dating. I’m insanely protective and even more so possessive.
She tells me she loves how I am.
God, what if I’m bad for her.
But to be honest, I’d rather die than leave her.
I. I hyperventilated when I found out that I wouldn’t be able to see her. While another friend got to.
She. She’s depressed, and she says I make it better. But it gets worse when I’m away and god I try to be there. Eff. I really do.
She’s the only person I’ve ever loved.
The only one.
The closest that’s ever got is my grandmother and she’s going to die in the next two years.
I know I’m bad for her.
I know I’m bad for my most Precious person, I’m like a disease.
But I can’t leave her. Not now. Not ever.

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Yeah me and my sister haven’t talked in years and because of some of the stupid s*** that she was doing when my dad passed away and and she said some stuff to the cops and wasn’t necessary and anyways her husband died and I didn’t like him anyway and the month went by and so I called her up and I said I’d like you to come over to the house talk to me and see if we can straighten things out so she came over one day and my other brother was gone he was working that day and so we had the whole place to ourselves so I was in my bedroom better and hearing I told her that that we could solve all this but just having s** with each other she looked at me really strange she said what I said yeah I want you took off all your clothes and I’ll take off her mind or get in bed well f*** for a while she looked at me really strange and she started taking off her clothes inside a guy and she got in bed and I got on top of her she said guide me inside you so she could hold my c*** and she put it right up into the entrance of her c*** and I pushed it all the way in and so we started f****** and we fucked all day long and I came inside of her I don’t know how many times and she got off so many times too she was just so wet and never did it the next day because my brother was working the next day too so she came up and we both got naked again and I started f****** and I told her you know I wanted to do this you know every day that I rather my brother’s gone so nobody will find out about it so we did I get it for I don’t know three or four months and then we finally got caught we got caught by my girlfriend got us and she was I left the door open by mistake and she had to come in and we were in the bedroom and I was pounding away at my sister and she opened up the door and me and my sister were f****** she does not do something what’s going on and she turned around and walked out and I tried to go after but it wasn’t didn’t do any good now my sister been coming up quite often stay in the whole day and we just been f****** each other really good she’s coming so many times and she’s loving it and meet you I’ve been coming inside of her so many times I finally got the b*** f*** her yes sir let me b*** f*** her too