I explained to my GF about acoustic harmonics within the animal kingdom pertaining to certain arachnids, this was after she wanted to ‘talk the talk’ AKA marriage. Some spiders can jump into another spiders web and hit the web with the same harmonic frequency as a viable mate. Spider scurries out thinking it’s scored and gets gobbled up by a bigger smarter spider.

I let her down gently but she learned something interesting as well, the discovery channel is always a good excuse and back up for breaking off or divorcing. Obviously I’m an inhuman monster. The next chick I break up with I’ll use dolphins as an excuse. You think flippers cute? Dolphins make tuna fisher men look like saints.