Here goes – I’m 15, I have a boyfriend, and we have been in a wonderful relationship for nearly 2 years, but for at least a month now, I have found him to be a bit irritable even when he is doing things right, and I am just kind of tired with him and the things he does. Saying this, he is very accepting of both my s******** (bi) and gender identity (genderqueer). I feel very bad saying he irritates me, as he may have mild Aspergers, and has anxiety and very mild depression. This has been made worse by the fact that I met a guy at a musical event I was at last week (who is the same age as my boyfriend) and even though we have been talking strictly as friends, I kind of have a crush on him. I know this will not culminate in anything, as he lives 100 miles away, smokes (a habit which I’m not a fan of), drinks alcohol regularly and I don’t know how he’d react to the whole genderqueer/bi thing. It might be because he’s into a lot of things that I’m into, or because I love meeting interesting and awesome people (blame it on the smalltown life), but I’m just a lot happier talking to him than my boyfriend right now, and that makes me feel so guilty. I started the relationship when I was 13, and made so many promises to never leave my boyfriend, and that he was the only one for me, but now I’m questioning it, and it hurts to question it. The worst part is that my boyfriend once had a dream where I left him and he took his own life, which makes me feel even worse. How can I at least tell him that while this may all clear up and I’ll still be with him, he needs to understand that I am not the be-all and end-all of his life?

I’m tearing myself apart over this.