I suffer from severe bi-polar disorder complicated with OCD, social phobia and PTSD. I never thought I would have anything but meaningless s** and short, unsatisfying relationships. I met a wonderful woman when I was younger, fell for her and things got physical. We had lots, and lots of unprotected s**. Like the young idiots we were. She got pregnant and we got more settled. She ended up dropping out of high school while I worked what ever jobs I could get to support us. With a job history that showed an inability to keep a job it became more and more difficult to hold a job. We moved to a new city, where I had a good job lined up, but in the week it took us to relocate the job no longer existed. Stranded in an area without a support structure we soon ended up homeless and lost our children. We left that state for another and tried to restart our lives. I am fighting for disability while she is struggling to finish her schooling. Every morning I feel lucky to know her, and hate myself for destroying her life. Without me and the issues I have, would she be happier? Would she have children at all? would she be successful? no one can answer these questions, but they haunt me all the time.