Everyone has some baggage, but mine is big and life threatening. It is not fair for me to look for someone, a boyfriend, because if I find him, he’ll be in danger too. It would be more ethical for me to choose to be alone, so when the time will come, I’ll be the only one to face all, and to fight the final battle, so to call it. Nobody should be taken into this story, me either actually, I haven’t done anything to go through this but being born into the wrong family, and supposedly, also being female.
But how can I choose to give up all my happiness for them, maybe one day everything will be over, I’ll be alive, I’ll be 50 and will find someone I will truly love, and will truly be able to be with him. But now, I have to sacrifice it to not involve someone else, but the only person who will pay is me, giving up a possible happiness, none of the evil people will ever. Unfortunately. I can’t face a guy on a date and tell him, if we get together you may find yourself with someone trying to kill you, in the next few years, it’s a big baggage I can’t unload on someone else. But I can’t even carry it any more. Wish they killed me when they tried, now I wouldn’t be torturing myself with this.