My whole life I’ve never stood up for anyone, not even myself. I feel terrible but I’m so quiet and soft spoken. One of my co-workers was talking down about one of my close friends today and I just stood there and let her. Like in my head I was going off on her but nothing came out of my mouth. I feel awful and I worry that my friends hate and judge me for it. Like they might say “I would stand up for him but he just stands there with his mouth shut.” What’s wrong with me.? I’m a terrible person. I also always lie and say more than what’s ever said. If someone says “I gave the boss a good word for you.” I tell people they told the boss I’m a great worker, one of the best they’ve seen in so long. Or if someone says something like “I don’t like her” I’m like she called you a b****, she hates you so much. I just wish someone would help me. I’m literally falling apart at the seems and there’s nothing I can do about it. Each day I grow more and more depressed for no reason. I’ve tried talking to my friend about this and it never comes out I just sit there and she thinks I bore her or something. I don’t know what to say or do. Maybe I should copy this and text it to her. I plaster a smile on my face everyday and people ask if I’m okay. I tell them yes but it’s a lie like everything else. I think I need therapy but I work at a job that only pays me $11 an hour and I could never afford that. I hate my job. I say I love it. It’s really just the people I work with. Customers are just so stupid and ignorant. I know what I’m doing just sit up get over it and let me do my job… I think I’m done now…