All my life I have had people perceive me as gay because I was a tomboy and not a girly girl but I am not. I have always been able to fight the rumor until recently. I found out I had hsv1 so of course my self esteem dived and I had some work issues and was all alone. So what did I do? I went to a website and watched lesbian p***. I had watched it before but never in a way that I felt good about it. I also saw the other woman as a man. Well anyway I got off on the p***. It was actually just good s**. It had nothing to do with the gender. She really let’s just say knew what she was doing downtown. I not only watched it once but a few times. I felt very bad after and knew it wasn’t something I really wanted to do. That is where the guilt and pain comes from. I felt I literally demeaned myself. This is a real confession please pray for me. I already asked God to forgive me.