This is true, and it's tearing me apart to not be able to tell anyone in real life... I am a young teacher (late 20s). Three years ago, I taught at a

12 years

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This is true, and it’s tearing me apart to not be able to tell anyone in real life…

I am a young teacher (late 20s). Three years ago, I taught at a school where all of the students had laptops. The students were allowed to take them home at night.

After graduation, I was in charge of resetting the laptops (cleaning off the hard drives), and getting them ready for incoming freshmen. While resetting one laptop, I noticed that one student left a folder in her trash labelled “for Mark”. I knew this student well, and I know that Mark was her boyfriend, so I couldn’t resist a peek.

There were about 40 videos of her stripping, and about 100 pictures in various poses. (Yes, we she 18 when they were taken.) I knew it was wrong, but I copied the entire folder onto a flash drive.

Even now, three years later, this flash drive is my go-to p***. I’ve seen each of these movies hundreds of times, but they never get old. The fact that I knew this girl – I taught her – and now I have these, and she has NO IDEA… I don’t know why that is such a turn on for me.

She and I have mutual friends on facebook, so I can see her page if I want to. Every time I go to it, and see how happy she is in college, I just want to message her and tell her how beautiful she is, and how happy she has made me without even knowing it.

I know this sounds completely crazy. I love her more than I’ve ever loved any of my girlfriends in real life. They don’t make me nearly as hard as these videos do. In my mind, I have a fantasy that she and I meet together one day by accident, and she admits that she always had a crush on me. Then we date, get married, and have beautiful children. All the while she never learns about the files.

Ok. Thank you for “listening”.

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I f****** hate you (bf) , you f****** manipulative,hypocrite, emotionally abusive, vaping, life draining, wannabe player b******. I.HATE YOU. I still deeply resent you. This is why everyone thinks you’re an a****** at your job. You’re not some anti-hero that you claimed to be. No- You’re just an a******. Point blank . Especially to me of all people! You always take it out on me, and you still wonder why I won’t touch you like that or shut down completely with you. Everytime you sense or feel even an inch that im happy, peaceful, something I enjoy doing you immediately smash that down so you can feel better and have power over me. What’s funny is that every time you’re in the wrong, overstep your boundaries, make me really upset or talk crap to me – karma smacks you right in the face everytime & you don’t even realize it. Funny how you’ve said yourself that people spit at the sky just for it to come back-yet you’ve done the exact same thing too – you’re not godlike or safe from getting karma, even I’ve dealt with karma too when I was in the wrong many times too. So no- you’re not a misunderstood dark knight turn bad like the joker you claim to be. You’re just an egotistical bigoted jerk & everyone can see that except you. I hate myself that I fell for your facade – lovebomb trap years ago . And all the times that you’ve talked crap about other’s appearances, especially women’s, karma yet again smacked you in the face & put on a ton of weight and still wonder why you haven’t lost pounds but still continue on demanding me to cook & make you even more food despite you complaining about it , hmmmm , gee I wonder why. Anyways , glad to vent that out .