12 years
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I was an awkward teen in the 80s. No money for anything but crap clothes. Bad teeth. No social life. Nothing. My sister, 1 yr older, was very pretty and popular, cheerleader, that route. She was able to borrow nice clothes from friends, lots of boyfriends, etc. I thought she must have the best life ever and that she would certainly have the most amazing future.

As I grew up, I took the time to develop my personality. Then I blossomed as I entered my twenties . Got my teeth fixed. I traveled, put myself through college, had some of the most fun love affairs I still remember with delight. Married a man that still brings me joy 20 yrs later. When I showed up for my 10 yr high school reunion, some of my classmates still couldn’t believe it was me. I was hot, successful, confident, and happy. I looked around and saw classmates that had gotten married out of high school, or had gotten stale and old before their time, too many kids, bad marriage, whatever , and it was sad. Same thing at my 20th reunion. I’m not trying to brag, but I have a point. You canNOT think that if you don’t have it going only an early age you are doomed. Even my mom said she had little hope I would become anything and was surprised by how I turned out. ESP since my sister ended up being a bitter adult for various reasons and gripes how she didn’t enjoy her childhood. I would never have guessed it. My husband says you don’t want to be ALL that in high school because where do you go from there? You can always be a comeback story. Always. No matter what age.

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I f****** hate you (bf) , you f****** manipulative,hypocrite, emotionally abusive, vaping, life draining, wannabe player b******. I.HATE YOU. I still deeply resent you. This is why everyone thinks you’re an a****** at your job. You’re not some anti-hero that you claimed to be. No- You’re just an a******. Point blank . Especially to me of all people! You always take it out on me, and you still wonder why I won’t touch you like that or shut down completely with you. Everytime you sense or feel even an inch that im happy, peaceful, something I enjoy doing you immediately smash that down so you can feel better and have power over me. What’s funny is that every time you’re in the wrong, overstep your boundaries, make me really upset or talk crap to me – karma smacks you right in the face everytime & you don’t even realize it. Funny how you’ve said yourself that people spit at the sky just for it to come back-yet you’ve done the exact same thing too – you’re not godlike or safe from getting karma, even I’ve dealt with karma too when I was in the wrong many times too. So no- you’re not a misunderstood dark knight turn bad like the joker you claim to be. You’re just an egotistical bigoted jerk & everyone can see that except you. I hate myself that I fell for your facade – lovebomb trap years ago . And all the times that you’ve talked crap about other’s appearances, especially women’s, karma yet again smacked you in the face & put on a ton of weight and still wonder why you haven’t lost pounds but still continue on demanding me to cook & make you even more food despite you complaining about it , hmmmm , gee I wonder why. Anyways , glad to vent that out .