October
see you everyday makes it harder. seeing you happy with other people kills me inside. remember when we were that happy? remember when you would always be touchy with me? remember when we would always laugh when you moan? yes i love that you are happy but you’re not happy because of me, someone else other than me is making you happy. being influenced to do things that they do to make you fit in, that’s not a way to live October. summer i was perfectly fine, haven’t thought abt you one bit until you came up to us. you saw us and came up to us and all the feelings came back, all the memories of us hanging out came back. it’s like we picked up where we left off but once you made friends with that girl.. things changed. during recess you weren’t with us you were with them. then you started hanging out with more and more and boom you are where you are now. i’m happy that you made new friends but you didn’t have to ghost us like that. you didn’t have too ignore us. seeing you holding hands and following eachother wherever you go makes me jealous, why should I be jealous? you never felt the same way about me so why am I still stuck on you. it’s been a year since I started liking you and yes I had some weeks or days without feelings but they never fully disappeared. I’m in love with your goofy side and your fun side, I didnt really like the bully or the tough side of you. learning that you vape makes me mad, like I don’t want you becoming an addict or have black lungs. I care about you yk? graduation day I was tempted to tell you that I like you and that you look very pretty today but no I chickened out 6th grade me would be so sad to figure out that we don’t talk anymore. you can make new friends and I guess you can drop me but im not saying that you always need to be my friend i just miss our talks and laughs. imagining sending this to you, imagining telling you how I feel, imagining if you never met them. imaging you seeing me as the way I see you. I’m probably obsessed right? why do i still like you, you are happy and have new friends that make you happy. im happy for you, i really am just make sure to be yourself and don’t be what people want you to be. if you need anything just tell me, you are welcome to just come up to me and talk to me. I love you will always.

to the person I’ve liked for a while.