I'm so tired. I think I'm having another hypomanic phase. I want sex all the time. I've started wandering the internet like I used to, just to feel

4 years

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I’m so tired. I think I’m having another hypomanic phase. I want s** all the time. I’ve started wandering the internet like I used to, just to feel desired and maybe have someone talk dirty to me. I don’t know why I can’t talk to my significant other about any of this. I don’t know why I hide things from him and lie to him. I don’t know why I lie to myself. I want to be kidnapped by a Dom and made to submit. I want to not have to worry about my lack of domestic, time management, organization, focus, life skills. I need a break from my lovely children. I need a break from planning and cooking dinner. I need a break from me regretting my past. I need a break from regretting not living. I need a break from flinching when I drive past a church. I need a break from feeling like a failure at everything. I wish I could just fade away and die, but I can’t leave my kids without a mom. It’s not fair that they have to grow up with a useless mom. I wish I had someone to talk to about this.

New Confession

Yesterday I went to the dark side with cream pie baking. I experimented with a cream pie nozzle made by German FIDO. Longest cream pie nozzle I’ve ever used. Let me tell you I normally bake two. The oven was overly full.

Related Confessions

I have to admit that I love to flash my c*** to adult women, of any age actually. I flash my c*** in my car, on webcams or in hotel windows overlooking parking lots or beaches like in Florida. My c*** is slightly larger than “average” but certainly not huge. Two women have told me that my c*** is really hard. I believe that several women have seen me though none have reported me and that’s a good thing.

One time in Florida I was laying on the lounge with my c*** surreptiously sticking out the side. Across the deck was a beautiful black haired lady in a bikini. She had really b*******. She was wearing sunglasses and getting some sun. Her lounge was slightly elevated but I couldn’t tell if her eyes were open. If they were she would have seen my c*** which of course was really exciting me. We were like that for about 15 minutes when another lady approached her and said something. She sat up, raised her glasses and took a clear look at me. She then lowered her glasses and resumed her position. She didn’t do or say anything. The only thing she did was bend her knee blocking my view between her legs. I didn’t trust the other lady so I left right away. That lady really took it in stride. I often wonder if she was offended, neutral or excited.

One night I was cruising with my c*** in my hand looking for a flashing opportunity. Up ahead was a girl hitchiking. She was wearing a loose dress from what I could see in the headlights and she was perfect. I decided to offer her a ride with my c*** out. If she got in, great and if she did not that was cool. I pulled up beside her and she opened the door. When that happened the interior light came on. She could see my c*** but I was so excited that c** exploded out of my c***. It happened so fast that I reached over, closed the door and took off.

I often wonder what she thought. Oh yeah, I also j******* to those memories.