My boyfriend and I were bestfriends before we started dating, and I honestly didn’t not want to date him. He was and still is the best thing I have, and my mom happiness in my miserable life. All of his friends and all of mine just wouldn’t stop giving us s***, saying that we needed to be together and they would just always tease us. He liked me from day one, and I just couldn’t risk losing him. I had just come out of a bad relationship and I wasn’t ready for another. Well, one night we were drinking and we kissed&held on to each other all night and after that I tried ti stop it but I just couldn’t. So, we started dating before I was ready, and he was really, really needy and I just couldn’t handle it. So I often thought about ending it, and talked about it to my friends. Well, one night a guy I liked before came over, uninvited, and he’s an a******, just cocky and only wanting physical things. At the time I had done nothing but kiss a little and that night he forced me into something although I said no, And continued to say no. We didn’t have s** but we did do something while I was still in a, relationship with my bestfriend, I didn’t tell him what had happened.. I was to embarrassed that I couldn’t stop it from happening so I just broke up with him, we were broken up for about two months and I tried to move on and just forget everything but there was a piece of me missing. I was so afraid of getting hurt again I just stuffed all my feelings deep inside, and after I realized I really truly loved him we were able to work things out and we’re still together to this day, been together now for a little over 2 years and all of this happened within the first few months. Besides what happened with that a******, he was my first everything. I love him so much more than I ever thought I could love a person. He changed after he got back together, he’s not needy and he’s just, different. We plan on getting married&having a family together. He’s the man I want to marry, there’s no doubt in my mind. But to this day I still have not told him what happened, and I can’t. I know if I do I’ll lose him. I haven’t flirted, cheated, or even hung out with any other guys and I don’t plan to. But knowing what happened kills me every day. I hate it.
