• 2 months ago

You know, if there’s one thing I learned in life, without even really realizing it, it just happened, from experience I guess, both in the way people treat me compared to what they say and in the way I feel about people compared to what is coming out of my mouth, it’s that words are pretty much worthless. They are meaningless.

I know you do. There’s people out there who don’t even know what it’s like to have people who are truely attracted to them in some way platonic or otherwise. They chase it around, try to force it, demand it. Me…. I have a trail of people going back as far as I can even remember and a trail of people, women currently trailing me around. I hear things constantly, I am a man btw. I know my worth, exactly. I know what people like about me. I know I’m a good looking man, I’m cool, I like cool things, I have good taste, people want to do what I do and it’s always been that way. That’s the way it is until now. I hear it from straight men jokingly. I’m a good looking man who is usually good at whatever they put their effort into. It’s not even all about looks, I know, but I hear it all the time, forever. People remember me. I made some kind of impact, and some of them are deep impacts.

Where I am now, I’ve experienced enough, I hear something like that directed at me in every day life today, not the internet, I mean every day life, in person, it doesn’t really do anything for me. I will literally say “yeah, I know”. I get a joke about marriage from a woman, or something like that, or I missed you, how good looking I am, it’s in one ear out the other. I imagine it like the hot woman out there who has been hearing it forever. She doesn’t care, she knows. To me it’s an interesting note, it’s something to think about especially at this point in existence, but that’s about it. I know. It’s not something I don’t know. I don’t take it like someone who is starved for that kind of thing. What is it about me? I’m not really trying, I’m just doing what is me.

Someone who actually wants someone to care, has never felt that, it might do something for them. I age well 🙂 damn, I age well. I’m blessed.