My nervourness corroes me, it bugs my performance, it corrupts my thoughs; I get anxious so often it’s my normal state, and ti seems I can not get a permanent solution for it, without negative side effects. I overeat for instace, to aliviate my stress. I sometimes feel I can’t help it, sometimes the suffering of the moment feels too much to handle without any help and then I overeat.

It’s hard for me to live in the mesh of my thougs, feelings and emotions, I can not concentrate sometimes, my mind travels to memories of difficult situations and invent numerous possible ways in which I could have handled them. I get to feel the stress of those difficult or frustrating situations once again, reviving the suffering once more. It’s a constant horror/terror. An impulse that push me into this past or future s***** scenarios almost instantly, and that I’ve not yet find an effectir or reliable way to deal with them, I can do something, but that something is still sometimes not good enough.