I have been dealing with this problem for about 6 years. This is really not an actual problem, but it is serious to me…
Ever since I was 10, started using computer excessively for gaming and drama watching. I have checked and I have the symptoms of addiction. My guilt is to myself. I keep torturing myself this way. I am still a student.
I know that using computer for entertainment is not really wrong, but I have been overusing it so much that I feel it is misusing and disrespecting this privilege that I get. I am and have always been a very conscientious person, but I never really succeed in quitting this addiction. It makes me feel awful. I have my own expectations of myself and standards I want to keep up, but ever since this, I have neglecting more than I can afford to. I do enjoy online gaming, and I do enjoy watching shows online, but I don’t want this to be all what my life is about. School, health, learning other instruments, dancing and a lot of other aspiration, they are all important to me. It have been serious to the point that I disregard my major exams and not revise, using my computer for unimportant activities till after midnight. I hate myself for this, I feel hurt and I want this to stop. But everytime it gets better, only to bounce back worse each time. I am tired and scared. I know that there is never an ending, until the moment you die, so I will not give up yet. I am turning to this page because I’m scared, of failing again. I’m also tired, of trying and trying and constantly fighting with myself. I want this guilt to stop haunting me. I cannot waste my life like this, and I want more. I feel lonely.