8 years
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When the day comes that I lose my mom, I will kill myself. She’s the only one that I owe anything to so I won’t leave her behind; I love her. My brother would be sad but he’s got a little family of his own now so he’ll be okay. Simply put, I’m unnecessary and that’s okay. I probably cared more about myself when I was fucked up on ecstasy every day and starving myself than I do now. At least I was looking for happiness and some kind of control. Waste of space. Waste of oxygen. Waste of trust. Wandering into a forest and shooting up heroin while a gentle snow falls on me sounds so peaceful.. and in death I will feed the forest and be useful.

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