I’m 14. My mum has been a single parent since I was a baby. She’s the only one I have. Now she’s dying of a currently incurable illness. She’s a strong christian… I hate god. I was abused by her boyfriend from the ages of 3-8. Now I get panic attacks and have trust issues. I want to get help. But she won’t allow it. She says I’m pitying myself… I’m suicidal. I have been since I was 5. I’m not good at making friends so I have no one close I can talk to. My worry for my mum has been distracting me and my grades have been slipping. Yet my mum just gets angry at me. I’m feel so alone…. And I don’t plan on seeing the age of 15.