i can understand how people cut themselfes. like how can you hurt yourself that much and how does that you feel better. i cannot stand blood at all, and my guess that that’s why i havent cut myself. if i’d be suicidal, i’d just go and kill myslef instead of harming myself and then killing myself.
my really good friend who is almoust like a sister to me has cut herself in the past and she has been in mental hospitals. in her case her mum found out about her being suicidal.
i personaly am also suicidal but my parents don’t know. i’m mostly suicidal because of the pressure by my freinds, family and school. even though school has ended i know that i have to go back to that prison again in autumn.
i just can’t quit school too because by the law i have to attend atleast 9 grades.
i mean that s****.
i know it’s the “millenial problem” and that back in the day everyone couldn’t attend school, but like i’d rather not attend school than deal with the stress from school.
when i’m suicidal it’s just like depressiong hitting me with a ton of books in my face. like one day i can be really happy and the next day i can be doing research on h********** myself. i want that to stop because on the happy days i know that there’s a future ahead of me, but when depression hits me i don’t see it.
the thing that has prevented me from killing myself is that i haven’t written a letter yet, i just haven’t had time. i even have a spit to jump from, that should kill me. well i guess i have to wait and see.
this isn’t a confession to make everyone feel bad about me, it’s just so i could let my feelings out and that other people cpuld maybe releate.