I have now lived with my roommate at school since late August. When I first met him, he seemed a little arrogant but the more I get to know him, he’s just very confident. He would do anything to help someone out, which is a side of him strangers probably wouldn’t guess. He has excelled at sports and is on the swim team. Sometimes, me and some buddies go watch him swim – and he is very good – wins a lot!

In our living situation it’s obvious that we are going to see each other in various states of dress/undress. He often studies just wearing his briefs, as do I. I’ve always thought of myself as straight. I have a girlfriend that I’ve been with almost 2 years back home. I haven’t cheated on her. Last night I caught myself staring at my roommate’s bulge. All of a sudden I realized I was actually wanting to see his d***. This has NEVER crossed my mind before in an intentional way. I’ve seen him naked before and have had plenty of chances to see his d***, but I have never once allowed my eyes to drop below eye level. I couldn’t tell you if it’s large or small.

This holiday weekend I will be with my girl and I am glad about that. I want to get these thoughts out of my head. Why would I have even had this get in my mind? I do NOT want to have s** with him and I am really freaked out about this. I have even contacted the residence hall director to see if another room is available but the soonest I can move is at the beginning of the year since there is no conflict between my roommate and I. He’s been a great guy and I’m afraid I’ll get some freak if I move, but this whole thing has me wanting to get a psych appointment.