12 years
x
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I’m worth so much more dead than I am alive. Currently a student at a four year university and live a supported upper middle class life. I’ve already left college once to enlist in the Marine Corps, however I signed a reservist contract so I’m back at home, exactly where I didn’t want to be. I live everyday with crippling regret about this decision and miss my year at mos school.
In addition, I’m madly in love with a girl I’ve never met, who lives 15 hours away. We Skype and snap-chat and call each other all the time, but I’m fighting the thoughts that she is having a thing for one of her friends she is talking about.
I’m broke, hate what I’ve become with my life, and have been horribly depressed for what feels like forever, feel like I have no reason to live anymore and think about offing myself at least a few times a day. These thoughts are compounded when I consider the $400,000 life insurance that my family would get if I would die.

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