I spent a lot of quality time over coffee with my MIL. We talked about anything under the sun for hours. Usually when my wife went out shopping or for lunch with her 2 sisters. One day she seemed abnormally quiet and when i asked what was on her mind she said that she was worried i would leave her daughter because she had heard from the other 2 that my wife had shut down s** in our marriage. She said that she knew i loved my wife but that it was clouding my judgement to accept a marriage witbout s**. I got pretty down about hearing the quiet part out loud at all even worse from my MIL who i had great trust in and respect for. She said that while she knew she should think of her daughter first she worried because she knew that i turned a blind eye to the topic and that she was also aware from the other two that my wife was making snide remarks about me m***********. She said she knew me well enough to know that i would never seek an affair but feared that that made me too vulnerable. As the conversation unfolded i admitted that i had considered paying for s** and she implored me to not do that because of risk of disease. Sad as it was i told her that my biggest reason for avoiding it was that all i would want from an e***** would be to be held and talked to while i masturbated but even then it would feel pathetic and lonely and i would not get the fulfillment of knowing i had given pleasure to someone else. She said she understood and we conversationally moved on to other topics.
Weeks went by and it did not come up again but we were rarely alone. But i should have expected she would bring it up again when the moment and privacy allowed. It was more embarassing for me because she said that one of my sisters in law told her that my wife had been making comments that i was being moody and quiet and that i should probably go to a h***** or j******* or something. I was actually angry about the fact that it was being talked about between the women and my MIL said that she got that but what i should be angry about was that my wife showed such disrespect and disregard to shame me to others especially her family. I had to admit she was right and she told me that both her other daughters had agreed to stop listening when my wife made such comments and to tell her to knock it off. I told her i felt really embarassed because this also meant that my SILs’ husbands doubtless knew my situation and all the comments as well. More weeks went by. The sisters go out shopping and my MIL and i are at her table again talking around the topic and she said the issue was not going to go away. I told her i got that but that there was no changing the situation. She left to go to the bathroom and when she came back as we talked about other things she eventually called me out on having been looking at her cleavage in the neck of her robe. I was so ashamed and tried to apologize but she actually laughed and told me to shut up because she had deliberately been showing her cleavage because she felt i deserved to get a peek at a woman occasionally. Then she did not say another word just looked at me and of course i could not stop looking now. It was not like she had huge breasts but the neck of the robe was open very low. I could not speak at all. She reached to the neck of her robe and pulled it more open and lower. All i could do was keep looking despite how awful i felt about what i was doing. She shrugged the robe off her shoulders revealing her breasts down almost to the n****** and by now i was so nervous and paralyzed sitting there trembling. She smiled at my facinated staring and thanked me fo4 the compliment. We sat there for what seemed forever until she spoke my name to get my attention, and just smiled and nodded at me and told me to not deny myself. Feeling so helpless and pathetic did not stop me from reaching under the table as i sat across from her and opening my pants to touch myself under the table. I was lost, slowly stroking myself as i stared at her breasts and sometimes able to look her in the eye. She told me to take my time and enjoy the view and what i was doing. She could tell when i was getting close, telling me to relax, to let it happen, and when she untied her robe and allowed it to fall off her shoulders and breasts completely i lost it and grabbed the edge of the table so tightly as my other hand milked my pleasure out of me. It was so emotional when she placed her hand on mine on the table edge as i moaned and emptied my desperate lust. When my contractions ended she continued to hold her hand on mine as i caught my breath. All i could do was look at her as she smiled, letting me keep looking as she sat there casually bare breasted and smoking a cigarette, eventually even lighting one for me then going to get me a washcloth then sat back across from me as i sheepishly cleaned myself and closed my pants and my face burned as she giggled as i cleaned my puddle off the floor under the table. She just watched as i rinsed the washcloth nervously and sat back down unable to even look at her. She reached over and stroked my cheek and told me to stop overthinking it. Then she asked me to not talk and to just listen. She told me to not read too much into this, but that it was something that yes felt like a betrayal of her daughter but that it was actually one of my SILs that had the idea and the other one convinced her it was a solution to the problem. I wanted to crawl into a hole and die but she made me promise to try to not be embarassed or ashamed and that the three of them (MIL and both SILs) were on my side so to speak. Otherwise there was no need to overtalk or overthink it whatsoever. Over the next months it happened regularly, my SILs simply told me the next time i saw them that they would never treat me badly but that i needed to be braced for the occasional discreet teasing about it in subtle private ways. The first few repeats were only at my MIL’s initiation, she would simply look at me across the table and smile at me and i would pleasure myself as she slowly bared her breasts. She was never impatient nor made me feel like it was a chore. She slowly began to ramp things up over time. I was so turned on by how she would sit there holding my eyes with hers smoking as i stroked myself. I felt like i would pass out the first time she told me to give it to her, to c u m for her. I obeyed as if hypnotized when she told me to stand up and let her watch. She always made it exciting every time. She started to seductively stroke her breasts as i did so. She started sitting close and eventually put my free hand in her breast. Eventually made a new rule that i be naked when i did it for her telling me i owed her the view. I barely kept my balance the first time she had me stand directly in front of her and held her breasts up and told me to milk myself onto them, even casually having a cigarette aftet as she had me clean her breasts with a washcloth. She eventually had me lay on the sofa as she sat across the room and watched me spend hours pleasuring my body for her. Eventually let me lay my head in her lap suckling and nuzzlimg her breasts as i stroked myself. I realized how emotionally addicted to her i was the day i sat at her table after her daughters left and after they left she walked into her own kitchen completely bare and had me follow her to the bathroom so i could touch myself while watching her shower. Even eventually as she lay covered in a bubble bath as i stood looking down at her and as i got close she lifted her torso to let me empty myself onto her wet breasts then had me watch as under the bubbles she pleasured herself while keeping my eyes locked to her eyes. I cherish the day she waited until they left so she could come into her own living room bare and kneel and watch me as i stroked myself for her to watch, then when she knew i was close, stood and took my hand and led me to her bed. She laid back with open thighs and reached up to me and pulled me close, her arms around my shoulders and her legs lockiing around me as i gasped when i entered her as she said it was ok, to just let it happen, we could take our time the next time.
I deeply value the time that both my sisters in law told me how much they cherished me bringing love and passion to their widowed mother’s life. How she had simply wanted to let me feel like a man again but how it had let her feel what a woman longed for again, a true lover for herself as much as her being my lover. After my MIL passed away those two sisters in law and i grieved together. One of them had divorced, and after several weeks tbey both sat me down and told me that she (the divorced one) wanted to fill their mother’s role in my life and i vowed to them both that i would do everything i could possibly do to bring her the joy that i had had with their mother. I am in my 60s now as they are and somehow it is even more fulfilling as time passes and my SIL and i are lovers just as equally as their mother and i were.
Love showing off the outline of my uncut penus. I wear thin nylon undies and walk on the beach. Ladies get an eye full, looking and smiling.
I cant sleep. I feel stupid for showing vulnerability to an untrustworthy relative (i adored them as a child) during my mother’s final illness.
I hate the world and society. I’m not kidding. I f****** hate it. So sick of this place. So sick of all the f****** selfish, shallow, cruel, ignorant, close minded f******** that I have to share air with. It may not be the dark ages anymore but this place is...
M’y mother believes that people with mental illness are a burden. Thank you mother I will not be seeking help for my eating disorder that causes debilitating depression. Thanks for making me feel like s***. I’m in literal pain and I can’t get help because you won’t take me seriously....
I force myself to stay awake through the night to intentionally mess my body up. I know that it is contributing to a lot of my problems but I just want to f*** myself up. I am too scared to cut, too scared to do anything that will...
It’s been two weeks since he left me. Its still so painful. I keep checking all media to see if he misses me too, but everywhere I look he is silent. He was my everything, I do not know what to do without him.
i hate you. you mke my life a living hell. people tell me im supposed to love you because youre my mother but i wish you were dead and i will never forgive you. i wish i didnt have to call you mum. you have caused me to be like...
Can I please not wake up tomorrow.
note: that boy had cuts all over his face and had the saddest smile and yet he gave me the brightest smile and most heartwarming stares and waves…
We both clicked and mimed together at the hospital. we are both little “insane” …what a beautiful boy.. a true boy…be my boyfriend. let me eat your heart like you eat mine. i want to sing for you.. heartbreaker, follow me boy – Exoplanets8 to the natural emo boy
i miss that boy. where are you boy?
I’m trying so hard not to be a pouty little prick. I’m on my period and we don’t want to make a mess so he jerked off and I’m just here h**** and unhappy. I don’t want to make him feel bad. He’s allowed. I’m just down. I haven’t been...
Love has not been good to me. Or maybe it’s been great. I don’t really know.
b** bleeds drive me insane!
Why are humans always hurting humans for fun? Nature and Animals are pure.
i just want to live a happy life
was it worth it? not sure now. met my married bf in a parking spot this morning and we were having s** and got caught by a jogger. she called the police they showed up did not arrest us but took our information down and waiting to see if there...
loneliness. few get me
Insomnia again. Cue the suicidal thoughts.
I feel so lost, so lonely and so consumed with the narrative of having had a hard life..that i write emails to my dead father to deal with it. i have so many friends who i love and always take care of, but i feel like i can’t talk to...
I feel so lost rn
I wish you’d laugh. I am creative which means that I don’t see my actions as right or wrong. You are not going to reach me.
Im here waiting c** over and baste me with your c**!
Everybody stays happy with me until they are able to redicule me otherwise they start hating and fighting with me even though I am well educated and can respond very well but they don’t understand
I really loved you, i still do. But you will never love me back.
freak——->
There is something happening but I have no one to tell in my life because Im scared they will judge me. The one non-judgmental person I know even said something backhanded….I hate it. I feel so isolated because of it and its not even having to do with me specifically….I...
i’m so so lonely. even with someone i’m still so alone. i hate myself and i wish i had the guts to end it. Instead, i sit here and lay on the ground crying holding back with all my strength on cutting myself. My ex and friends were right….I am...
I hate myself, I deeply deeply hate myself.
And it’s not because deep down I’m some mean a****** that treats people or animals badly. I always help everyone around me as much as I can, it’s the little things, the little gratitudes that give little sparks of happyness in my...
I wwaant to m********* to furry vore rn eeeek
i wish i had a normal life. i’m going back into depression and being suicidal and no one cares. just like how they didn’t care long ago either,
Today’s a good day so far & I still feel like harming myself.
After 2 months, I geniunely want to die. I can’t take this anymore. I lost the love of my life, I lost one of my closest friends. If dying is the only real option to end this cycle, then so be it.
GO AND F*** YOURSELF THIS IS WHAT I AM GOING TO TELL YOU NEXT LOOKING INTO YOUR EYES
I AM NEARING 40 AND I HAVE DONE IN MY LIFE WHAT I COULD DO.
WHETHER I AM SUCCESSFUL OR LOOSER SO BE IT
NOTHING IS GOING TO CHANGE IN ME!
I had to put down my dog of five years today due to old age and medical issues. There is a chance he could have lived another year, but he was really struggling and I thought it was best. I feel so much guilt. My head hurts, my jaw hurts,...
I ŵ1šh į WāS ðęäÐ
My boyfriend started taking a new medication and he’s been ejaculating within minutes. He offers to help me get off but it’s not the same. I want d***. I don’t want him to feel bad about it so I just carry on.
Deep down I have so much emotional and...
Wish I had the guts to kill myself.
I wish I wasn’t bisexual. It makes me feel so dirty to de attracted to women. Why couldn’t I have been straight? why do I need to be burdened with bisexuality? I’m not looking for pity or anything. My s******** is a source of annoyance and I can’t ever say...
I miss D
Sometimes I feel like I have fucked around and waited too long to find a man that by the time I do and I have my life and s*** together I won’t be able to have children. The worst part is that my social media is filled with my friends...