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i tried nitrous for the first time last week, on his birthday. it was kind of underwhelming. i think i already have a tolerance from past ketamine abuse since it acts on the same receptors

i am thinking of doing ketamine again. i do it every few months or so now. im tired of snorting lines though and ive been thinking a lot about injecting it again. IV is like a dream, but apparently its easy to “pass out” before you can take the needle out of your arm, so im worried about taking really high doses. IM takes a little more time, but it leaves you with muscle pain for a few days wherever you shoot it up.

ive had a plate of lines sitting in my room for like a month now. itd be easiest to do those, i just hate the long 12 hour comedown when i take enough for a k hole….

4 Views

I haven’t decided whether to record my exit strategy. This helium-based strategy isn’t particularly gory, so I think it’d be suitable for recording. If it can be of benefit to the medical research community then I feel like it’d be a good thing to do. During one of my “test” attempts, I found that I subconsciously ripped the bag off my head. I will need to remedy this by cuffing my hands to a sturdy frame, and then turning on the gas. You did this, Fiserv.

8 Views
a pain
5 years

I hate my f****** daughter so much right now. She’s a f****** b****. I did not raise her to be like this. I did everything for all my kids and this is the thanks i get. General bitchiness and complaining when i need her help. I kind of hope that...

554 Views
a pain
5 years

I think of killing myself often. Wish I had the guts to do it.

309 Views
a pain
5 years

OKAY so i have a best friend who ditched me becuz of her new frnds..she didnt called me nor texted me in the last 6 months..one day we had a fight that our bond is changed and blah blah..then we decided to clear the misunderstandings but her call or text...

473 Views
a pain
5 years

My only wrong estimate about life was that I didn’t know I have prove my a** off despite ivy league and degree from premium institute.

I also didn’t know that people will do what is reasonably possible to prove that they don’t like me.

263 Views
a pain
5 years

I basically killed all my dreams and childhood hopes because I’m graduating with an engineering degree. But the work I do is depressing and boring and I no longer know how to have fun or enjoy things like I used to

152 Views
a pain
5 years

My sister, although she refuses to call me that in private because I am adopted, has burnt her bridges from her family by filming us in secret, stealing our social security cards, physically and emotionally abusing us. She had no one left because we all saw her for who she...

305 Views
a pain
5 years

Spread Our Snatches for Cuba #SOSCUBA

396 Views
a pain
5 years

I cant shake this deep sadness of the past 3 yrs….i feel like im never going to be even close to happy ever.

218 Views
a pain
5 years

Good lord you old witch, leave me the f*** alone! I’m so beyond sick of your s***! You are nothing but a miserable burden on this world.

424 Views
a pain
5 years

I instantly assume people dislike me no matter what I try to tell myself.
I’ve built a lot of friendships with people IRL and online, but in the back of my mind I always seem to subconsciously think that people dislike me. Or that they are nice to my...

378 Views
a pain
5 years

i want to kill myself and kill everyone else i hate my dad i hate my mom i hate everyone i hope i get hit by a tow truck and die i don’t want to wake u ever again i hate everyoje i hope i die

218 Views
a pain
5 years

I feel myself slipping away, my lifelong pet and companion has passed on
and the lakes are drying up, how do i keep hope in the midst of this.

251 Views
a pain
5 years

Little people know, and my family doesnt know about this, i selfharm myself yesterday, i dont want it to bleed because it’ll leave some scars, i wanted to die everyday i’m losing hope

163 Views
a pain
5 years

I wish I wasn’t so scared of pain & death.

444 Views
a pain
5 years

im so tired of being in a relationship. emotional burden is so heavy.

318 Views
a pain
5 years

the last 3 yrs ive felt like i was on the brink of something great, magical fufilling but can never truly reach it. I always fall flat, come up short or left wondering when that moment will come…this feeling is terrible. Always reaching for something that might not ever happen…

376 Views
a pain
5 years

I met this girl in 2020 and I had a good connection with her me and her used to play games until sunrise and she always made me smile until i found out that she was also playing with my classmate, i thought we shared something special but i guess...

568 Views
a pain
5 years

I told you not to get your hopes up. We always get our hopes up and then look what happens.

345 Views
a pain
5 years

My father molested me and I feel like it was my fault. I’m stuck in a turmoil of pain and confusion.

493 Views
a pain
5 years

Better off dead. That is all.

233 Views
a pain
5 years

They say parents want you to out grow them succeed and be better than them..That’s all a lie most want to die before they see you become successful..

185 Views
a pain
5 years

I love a girl since my college days but I haven’t told her yet. Maybe because I have seen her in a relationship which she broke and then got into another one of which I have currently no idea. And now I am afraid about the consequences of telling my...

267 Views
a pain
5 years

This happen long time ago in the 1980’s in my school days. To impress my classmates and mock my teachers as rebel, critical thinker and atheist , I would make fun of Hindu belief systems , stomp on books (considered sacred gift from goddess’s of knowledge Maa Saraswati). I beg...

366 Views
a pain
5 years

Wish I knew how to make myself throw up when I’ve screwed up my diet. Even if it’s just a small part of it.

241 Views
a pain
5 years

It really s**** when someone around you is trying to change you in ways you don’t want to change. You get berrated with all kinds of guilt and shame and insults and invalidation.

We all handled the beginning of the pandemic as best we could, right? Well to be...

392 Views
a pain
5 years

Thanks for executing my dog.

176 Views
a pain
5 years

My mom will never understand how shes never around for me. She will never understand how I practically had to raise myself half of the time. Whenever I have tried to talk to her, she always says something like “I can’t do anything right” or “I’m a terrible mom, huh?”...

189 Views
a pain
5 years

Turns out I’m 10 years too late to buy a suicide kit all made up nice. Everything has to be hard. The world is in a damn helium shortage. Can I just off myself in peace?!

258 Views
a pain
5 years

Not suicidal, but I wish I was never born & that I didn’t exist.

157 Views
a pain
5 years

I am a slave to my compulsions. If I have no free will, then how can I be morally culpable. Is the lion morally culpable for stalking the gazelle until it collapses from exhaustion? No.. it’s in it’s nature. The lion does what it does automatically. If you pour chum...

237 Views
a pain
5 years

What the f***. Why must I read an entire f****** article just to have simple question answered. It’s f****** insane how full of themselves these damn bloggers are. Just answer my f****** question!!!!

338 Views
a pain
5 years

‘You have never seen anything like this’ — Prestonian on Clark Hallisey’s r*****

197 Views
a pain
5 years

I still have feelings for this girl that I liked in highschool, she was a junior and I was a sophomore. I really did like her, and I no longer remember why I ghosted her all those years ago, but when I tried to reconnect with her she was already...

515 Views
a pain
5 years

I, out of everyone understand, reach out!!
Message me if you need a friend. (Well post) and I can be your friend. 😇😌 this life is a B****.

200 Views
a pain
5 years

I don’t know what to do anymore.

373 Views
a pain
5 years

I’m sorry, stranger.😔😌 it’s okay to not be okay.😌

200 Views
a pain
5 years

Here we go again with the self harming & suicidal thoughts.

269 Views
a pain
5 years

I am the odd one in my family

172 Views
a pain
5 years

when i was in 8th grade, my teacher kinda touched me.

the first time i met him, he asked me why i didn’t want to be a model. he said i was beautiful and smart and talented. i knew he had a history of acting inappropriately, he forced one of...

511 Views
a pain
5 years

I just found out that my mother was left with an inheritance from her father to an apartment in Mexico City when my siblings and I were younger. Now as a USA born hispanic, I think I would had much rather lived in my family’s country, just to feel more...

454 Views
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