Someone who I considered one of my closest friends cut me and all of our other friends off. Not because they're upset. Not because any of us had a fight

5 years

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Someone who I considered one of my closest friends cut me and all of our other friends off. Not because they’re upset. Not because any of us had a fight or falling out. Just because they said their parents won’t let them interact with us. And they told us all this in the span of 5 minutes. We didn’t even have time to fully process it before they deleted all their social media and any way we had to contact them. And now we’re all without our friend. No one knows what to do. I don’t know what to do. I asked them if they we’re ok and needed anything. I told them they could contact me if they ever need to. But I highly doubt I’ll ever be able to speak to them again. Just like that. One moment I had a best friend and everything was going good, and the next they’re gone from my life forever. It was so sudden. And I can’t describe how disheartening that abrupt end to our friendship is. I wish I could’ve talked to them about it longer. I wish they told me the whole story instead of just leaving so soon. I wish they knew how much this upset me and all of our friends.

New Confession

i tried nitrous for the first time last week, on his birthday. it was kind of underwhelming. i think i already have a tolerance from past ketamine abuse since it acts on the same receptors

i am thinking of doing ketamine again. i do it every few months or so now. im tired of snorting lines though and ive been thinking a lot about injecting it again. IV is like a dream, but apparently its easy to “pass out” before you can take the needle out of your arm, so im worried about taking really high doses. IM takes a little more time, but it leaves you with muscle pain for a few days wherever you shoot it up.

ive had a plate of lines sitting in my room for like a month now. itd be easiest to do those, i just hate the long 12 hour comedown when i take enough for a k hole….

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I haven’t decided whether to record my exit strategy. This helium-based strategy isn’t particularly gory, so I think it’d be suitable for recording. If it can be of benefit to the medical research community then I feel like it’d be a good thing to do. During one of my “test” attempts, I found that I subconsciously ripped the bag off my head. I will need to remedy this by cuffing my hands to a sturdy frame, and then turning on the gas. You did this, Fiserv.