My gay lover Beauregard and I were fooling around. I laid on a table naked, raised my legs and put my feet against the wall. Beauregard mixed a batch of concrete, placed a funnel in my rectal cavity and poured in the mixture.

Everything was fine at first but about an hour later I developed abdominal discomfort and pain in my bowels. Beauregard dropped me off at ER and the doctors asked me what happened. I didn’t want to tell them at first, but after digitally examining my rectal cavity I came clean.

They put me in the Trendelenberg position and used two Foley catheters to relieve suction. They then delivered a concrete case of my a***. Ridges were consistent with mucosal folds and a thin layer of faeces covered the surface. It felt like a pressure valve had been released in my a**.

The doctor recommended I undergo a psychiatric examination but I declined. Instead I asked for the concrete case. It now hangs from the rearview mirror of my car.